Do you want to know what Ive been doing?....Yes you do you know you do.No I didnt fix the toilet,neither did I replace it either.No I didnt blow up my ex although nice suggestion Mort me dear.No I didnt ram a trolley into someone at Iceland at all.
No I painted a very large exterior wall in my back yard !!!
Yes ok its not all that exciting to you,but I no longer have moss and some unexplainable orange matter growing on it,which is nice.
I was surfing the net,as is my want,last night,and I innocently put in a search,now I might have spelt it wrongly,Im not sure to be honest,but it took me to a site about nose hair fetishes......
Im not kidding,there are people who actually get aroused at the mere sight of long nose hair,so much so,a man in somewhere near Russia,(of course),has grown his nose hair to....youll love this....6" long!! Its not a world record though apparently in the late 1800's a scottish man had grown his to a whopping 10".Im not sure if thats a world record or not.I cant say I did much more research if Im honest,but Oh My God !! He had it in a snood,( A net meant for beards and moustaches to cover when working in a food prep area,Im full of useless info me),It was hilarious.
Not bad for googling waxing products for chimpanzees with exzema !!
So I googled ....Hairy toes,and guess what?? Yep I did get hairy toes,but Mr.Scotland 1800 with his hairy nose came up again,I think Im in love,pity hes 200 years old...Zoe youre weird babe.
Hairy toes by the way are another fetish,can I just say,come on people...hairy toes? Some women suck them and love the hair and some women actually have it themselves,ITS WRONG !! Good grief.
I think I need a bath.
Yes,just in case your wondering,(Im sure you are),hairy ears did come up too,now look here,thats just overstepping the mark !! Itll have earwax attatched to it somewhere you mark my words,stop putting things in your mouth !!
Its like people who root their ears out with penlids on the end of a pen then you pick it up and whilst on the phone put it in your mouth and...STOP IT...use a damn cotton bud,honestly.
Or people who trim their toenails then leave the trimmings either in the trimmer,or even worse,on the floor and you spike your foot.
Or people who use inannimate objects to clean under their nails and wipe the debris over the arm of the chair,or people who empty the hair from a hairbrush onto the floor.
Or ex husbands....just ex husbands...