Feeling flat

Im feeling quite low today,partly because Im not 100% well,but mainly due to things that keep happening.Not necessarily going wrong either,but the days tend to merge into one long annoying moment that doesnt seem to have an end.Maybe its still the winter blues,or the onset of spring thats winding me up,maybe its just exs.
In fact ok,yes its just exs.
For my sins I have two,yes only two,and yet the mayhem and stress they cause keeps me constantly busy.
Not so much stress to me,but to others,daily life and etc.
Its a bit like having an itchy spot on your bum in the middle of the high street,you cant seem to find a quiet place to scratch the bugger.
When you do its come to a head and hurts like hell.
Kinda like my life that eh? A spot on the ass of the world.
However,after much deliberation,I have decided to take the bull by the gonads,and ride the crest of the current wave and stop using stupid metaphores.
What I propose,is an old disused island,probably used for nuclear testing back in the 70s,to be used to transport all exs to,the ones who never go away.Then take one large exocet missile,target the island from a safe distance,place a camera on the end and launch the bugger.
Or...take one large very peed off grizzly bear,place it on the island,after placing a very small rubber band around its testicles,smear jam all over the afore-mentioned exs and watch them run.
Or....Bury the exs up to their necks in sand,smear honey over their faces and release the soldier ants.
Or....leave all the exs naked on the island,with 200 loved up rhinos in mating season.
Or...just put up with the crap like I normally do.
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